Floetry

So im in the university library, sitting down on facebook (as you do in libraries) and went on this musicians FB page to check out some of his beats. Clicking like a random maniac, I eventually find a beat that transports me across into another world of efflugent soundscapes that shift into new and exciting forms that epitomise the sense of flow. It got me thinking about writing to express the vibe and imagery. I don't think I could do it just by writing in novel form (to be honest, i'm quite terrible at that as you've seen from my horrible short story that I posted a coupla posts back), so the next step would be do to it in poetry. I've written about one poem that I'm actually proud of, but for me that's enough of a inspiration to actually write more of it. Consequently, I really feel like I want to write some poetry and get more involved in it. I tend to shy away from these things because whilst I write them I feel rather pillock-y. Since coming to university though, that sense has sort of decreased but it lurks in the background like a hyena waiting to scavenge on you the moment you die off. Getting back to the point though, I think I may start writing some and posting it up here as this seems to a medium that I quite like to do these things with. So look out for it hokay?

Right, for now, I better get back to work!!

Time Vampires

I've recently had alot of trouble with gmail in trying to reset my password, but finally I've fixed the issue and I'm able to write on this blog again. I can't really think of anything to talk about so perhaps another time! I might start talking about some of the recent films i've watched, in particular The Darjeeling Limited.

Odd World New World

So one day I was walking through the woods, with blades of brilliance stabbing through the shield of the tree tops, and I happened upon a sign. This sign pointed into 4 directions, each one looking more ominous than the next. The first direction was upwards, towards the sun and naturally I'd feel more comfortable going to the golden colored disc of light, but this felt like a one way street. The second direction was to the moon and once again I'd still feel comfortable basking in the ethereal and luminescent patter of light from the sun's sister but something gnawed at me, giving me some sort of sinister vibe that I couldn't quite shake off. Perhaps it was the fact there was a large pair of canines that circumferenced the little old moon. The third sign pointed towards an apotheosis of deserts. Deserts scared me naturally because of their lifelessness so going towards one would scare me even more. The last sign post pointed to the vast bed of blueness that was the ocean. I would have opted for the ocean as they tend to have that Je ne sais quoi that often entrances the mind into a lulled state of awe, however there were sharks in the picture that made me rather tentative.

Now this is where the story gets interesting. See, I could have gone back, but something about going back felt like it would lead to that niggling "what if" sensation. So onwards I had decided to go, but in which direction? Out of all of them and in my fractured opinion, I opted for the ocean - hey at least I'd die a peaceful-esque death right? I think :S. Anyway, so taking that last option I walked on for about 4 klicks and ended up at a deserted beach. It was still daytime, with the sun at its zenith at this point. With the light beaming down, I thought I'd see more here but I was mistaken. So taking a few deep breaths, I jump in and start swimming - aimlessly mind you - to try and find some sort of answer to the signpost. Maybe it was answers to myself - swimming in this vast blue ocean reminded me of alot of things in my own mind. See, I was still searching for something, much like how the ocean has that Je ne sais quoi feel to it, so did this goal in mind. I guess that's why I decided to go ahead and make a choice regarding the sign post instead of walking back and regretting it later. See, life's too short to not live it - so I figure we're all gonna die, why not make life interesting and experience what you can eh? Hell I might get some kicks out of fending for myself against the sharks. Come to think of it, those cut throat sharks remind me of something else....in a certain place with foreign people.

But I digress. So, I began swimming and by chance I manage to swim to a boat that's sort of eerily floating in the water without anyone inside. Nonetheless, I found somewhere on this empty ocean, so why not stay here for a bit and enjoy the break. After basking in the warmth of the sun, I look around the boat for any food - you'd figure I'd be hungry at this point right? Unfortunately, there's nothing available :(. Even so, I've now got a boat so I decided to use it to sail the oceans. Still aimlessly, but with a bit more pace :).

The End

Flowers some Reflection Eternal and a Modal Soul

Today I've just found out that one of my favourite hip hop producers, Nujabes, has just passed away. This is really sad news - for me personally, he was one of the producers that provided the stepping stone into the world of alternative hip hop which I never knew existed. Without his contribution I feel I would never be where I am musically. The details of death state that he passed away in a car accident on the 26th of February, which was the same day a 7.3 magnitude earthquake hit Tokyo and that a private ceremony was held for him.

My first exposure to his music was through Shinchiro Watanabe's Samurai Champloo. His music, alongside Fat Jon's, made half that animé what it was. The music got you more involved with the action, made you empathize with the characters, helped depict the almost oxymoronic world of samurais with hip hop and endearingly too. The music really drew you into the zany world that was being created by Watanabe-San. The funny thing is, I really hated the intro he made with ShingO2 at first! It grew on me and then I finally got the vibe he was giving out and from then I've not really looked back on it musically speaking. Since then I've scouted out whatever music he made and enjoyed every bit of it :). Even now, as I'm listening to Horizon, I'm entranced by the beatism and jazziness of it all. The fact he and Fat Jon practically and single handedly brought me into the world of alternative and jazzy hip hop speaks volumes about their class and genius.

The world has lost a great musician :(.

To quote my friend's blog, which aptly put it:

"Some live, some die, in the name of the samurai, some fight some bleed, sun up to sun down, the sounds of a battlecry"

RIP Seba Kun aka Nujabes.

Build An Ark

My oh my, look what we have here - a decrepit blog with about zero input for god knows how long! too long have you been neglected my voice of the voiceless :). So what's been happening in the intermittent period between the last post and now? well a shed load so let's break it down into the following:

1) I'm in Uni studying medicine

2) I've moved out of London away from home and making friends here

3) Had a few exams and a coursework!

4) Now struggling to be motivated to get my arse into gear - curse you xbox and pc!

Right, that's my list of most interesting things summarized in about four points.

Oh yeah, I'm cooking for myself - not doing too bad, been cookin veggie sausages, yummeh!

Okay, moving on from that (I've noticed I've got quite a scientific vibe going with my listing and such....the joys of scientific courseworks :P) I think I'ma talk about something that interested me more than I thought it would.

About a month ago I had this really strange craving to watch Gundam Wing. I'd been lying in bed thinking about my childhood days of watching it on Toonami and thinking "wow that's is pretty damn cool" but I felt it was a bit too complicated for my DBZ hayday :P. I think being here away from home makes you think alot about who you are and where you come from, both culturally and individually. So on that train of thought, I just remembered this show and decided to download it and watch it. I was a bit hesitant because the copy I had was in dub (eek) so essentially I already was limiting my viewing experience. Put on top a niggling feeling that Gundam stereotypically was about big machines fighting each other (DBZ robot style) and you had the set up of an epic failure. Nonetheless, there was something egging me on to watch it, so that's what I did.

You know what? I was pleasantly surprised. Whilst it was a bit melodramatic (it seemed the characters were exaggerated a fair bit for some stuff that seemed kind of absurd to do so) I liked the ideas they put across. However, these characters, for all their accentuated drama, had understandable notions (apart from wufei - i was confused by his "YOU SHOULDN'T FIGHT, SO IM GOING TO KILL YOU" style), from Treize desire to find a chivalrous battle in which humans can find that despair in what war truly means and why by fighting we can really see how harmful it is to us as a species, to Relena's idealistic (maybe far too much I have to say) notion of creating true peace by having all parties discarding their weapons. For a series that's that single handedly made Gundam famous in the USA, I was intrigued by the notion of peace throughout it. Here you have a series that's choc-a-bloc full of fighting yet there's underlying feeling that all the fights seem...pointless (not to watch, but what their aims were). Looking at it one way, you could say that the fights all highlighted the futility of war. However there's a thin line being tread here - for all the talk of peace, these gundams, which are labelled as symbols of rebellion, are trying to create peace by destroying other ships. It seems kind of contradictory, but when you bottle it down - when can you really and truly have peace without defending it? it is human nature to fight and yet it is also human nature to try and find a peace of mind - even those who are afflicted psychologically try and find resolution by doing what they feel will satisfy their mind-state. In some twisted way, satisfying yourself is one form of temporary peace but it is not the true higher level of peace that many people aspire for, because that kind of peace relies on reducing those carnal desires and finding calm contentment, which cannot be found in those disparaging ways. For me though, whilst the notion of peace was a good mention, I feel that the biggest draw is how history repeats itself in this story. Out of all the aspects covered, this is the one I feel is done the most expertly because you always feel that one dictatorship is being replaced by essentially another under a guise of peace through sheer military force being used to dominate. You see three of these throughout the 49 episode run, giving you a real sense of it.

Overall though, whilst the story had some intriguing ideas, I think the tedious melodrama cuts it down a bit and so you're left with a story that has lots you can extrapolate out from its core, but the surrounding enclosure is full of poor execution.

I'd give it a 6.5/10.

People's Instinctive Travels and the Paths of Rhythm

Right about now I think I am quite disillusioned with myself. In a time where I'm about to leave things just seem so out of place....it's hard to describe it. At home, there are all these plans to renovate the house, with my friends they're all starting to go their own paths as I am going on my own. With that the tangled trees in between our paths just start to get more tangled and greater in number. Deep down I think inside I'm doing this to myself because I am moving away and starting off somewhere else; I'm getting all disillusioned with everything because I'm the wheel in the cog that's getting removed and my place no longer fits properly like it did. For someone who has never really done much for himself (Admittedly and ashamedly out of procrastination and other excuses) it's a big shock to the system. I'm hyping the situation probably and it won't be so bad, but going it alone is such a big change that I can't help worry about these things. See, i'm quite the "stressed eric" and worry and fret and think about things moreso than needed :P. Anyhoo, apologies for this rather depressing post :P.

Water Got No Enemy

Out of all the songs I've been listening to recently, this one has to be the one song that's resonated the most. Maybe that's because of the..er..."time" associated with it, which in hindsight probably does have a big role to play, but to be honest every time I do listen to it I just feel im drifting away slowly into the sunset - like the credits of a massive film called "Life - the end of an era" is rolling and this song is just accompanying those credits with pictures of events in my life. There's something so resolute and positive in this song that it feels like it's high note for the ending. When I think about it though, I reckon it's mostly to do with the ending of an era of me and TK and our free jams - we ended it on a good note and my nostalgic senses have gone into overdrive as a result. That's why I think I keep hearing this song with ending credits - the actors all playing their parts in this film and moving onto their new projects, making different films and getting into new roles, ones you'd never think to see them in.

As well as being positive, it makes me sad at the same time, as nostalgic trips tend to do - in the same way you feel sad if a really good film comes to an end, you also relish the good ending that comes along with it. Still, maybe there's always time for a sequel eh?

Deep Fried Frenz

Hi kids! Today we're going to make eggrolls from banana skins. Right, what you do is open up a banana, take the skin and dash it on someone's forehead. The natural oils in a person's skin just exfoliates the skin and gives it a natural and nutritious combination of vitamin c and antioxidants - so get the most oiliest and greasiest person you know, throw that skin and make sure you feel that resinous texture in your hand. The oil allows you to get that really high cholesterol flavour but in a much more healthier way. I think it's just absolutely divine.

Now once you have that done, what you need to do is get the banana and chop it up into small pieces and take the peel; this part is VITAL so take heed with what im about to write next. The peel will be used to make the egg whites. That's right, the egg whites. So what you do is, take the peel, throw it in a blender with milk, paint stripper and dulux paint at exactly 20 ml, 1 litre and 10 litres. Blend for 20 minutes until you get this really rich, gelatinous and gorgeous feel to it. Take this amazing mixture into a baking tray and place the banana sking in a circle in the middle of the mixture.

Put this into the oven at gasmark 4 and leave for half an hour until a crispy and crunchy contortion comes out of the oven and there we have our egg roll.

Best served with a bowl of feta cheese and whisky.

Enjoy this sumptious morsel as it's the perfect summer and date food!

14 Years: Nostalgia

This is the first time I've written a poem in about 3-4 years and it has to be listened to the Fat Jon track , 14 Years, for the whole bang. Peace!

The quaint sound of a broken record permeates the room,

Its chicago jazz dancing across like a debutante searching for a groom.

The reverberations puncuate my ear, searching

for a cerebral bank of memories

The trigger sets off a forest of sepia toned feeling,

With falling autumn leaves hung in suspense in the eternity of mind.

I walk through my mind's eye and touch the blue and white ceiling

of clouds; my hand caressing their warm innocence inside.

I dive into the rush of calm nostalgia,

Swimming in a rouge ocean of tender

Romantism. I stop and float into the cerulean depths of meloncholy

Drifting to the bottom, looking for the tranquility,

With an anchor weighting for the moment.

A dark bed bursts, body flung up and a whisk of wind!

The scent of the gale generously gliding over

Pulling -- into a kaleidoscope of sound

With the echo coating the apoethetic snow-capped mountains, green vistas and golden deserts.

The cosmic rhythm guides me freely, Inviting me, before the eyes open

And the broken record has started again.

Omni

It's a song by Five Deez, a hip hop group from cincinatti with Fat Jon as the producer (you can hear his sound all over this album). Their actual name stands for the fifth dimension, which according to them is the "dimension where you experience music". Kinda cool eh? Some of their lyrics are pretty deep and interesting when you engage with it, especially one that goes "And times change, like the falling autumn leaves, personalities are cemented in this present state, most people become content, no thoughts of more buildin' off now". You know what? lemme just post that shizzle up:

(When in the world are you going to settle down

and start doing something with yourself?)



[Hook 2X]

I know what you wanna know
(An intellectual, fate offers no hint)

I see what you wanna see

(I think I might like to see you)



[Verse 1]

Now you know the way I wanna be

You see the direction, create the cross sections

Movin' me to places to soak up the lessons

Dried my tears years ago with no question

But you seem better from the back

More space to function with

Motion's not restricted to what I give it

Completely fill your area like liquid

No untouched surface greater than what's less

Than is expected of all men

Projected a few before you elected a few

(Who knew?) I would be the one you had to have

Full body massage with the words of my choice

Sound healin' is produced with the science of man

You should keep your eye on it if you rely on it

Chase whatever makes you wanna change vapor

Understanding consequences

What exactly is this? Who exactly are you?

Are you me enough to know what I know when

You seein' us

I watch it all begin to spin over and over again

But it's never the same I feel

And when I finish the sentence what really remains?

Now I'm boardin' the plane to go exist on another



[Hook 2X]



[Verse 2]

(Close) I haven't been this way with most

Learned aggression, hate, and love too

A lotta what I think is based off my perception

As I travel, it makes sense, movin' me mo'

And times change

Like the fallin' autumn leaves, personalities are cemented

In this present state, most people become content

No thoughts of more, only buildin' off the now but

Then never changes, at least we never see it

We want what will be to be beautiful and just to happen

(But it doesn't work that way)

(It all stays the same at the end of the evenin')

You lay and contemplate sunrise and sundown

Who made the best decisions?

Was it you, somebody you know, or a stranger?

And if anything, what did you learn?

Are you equipped to just weep? (No shame)

Because you know what life is

A collection of seconds that we watch go by

And some times for not and at sometimes for

But all times livin' with a question on ya mind

Pain and freedom, fear and independence

Chances, mind games, war, and only breathin'

Unknown to known facts, insecurities

Confidence, sadness, faith, and what you know now



[Hook 2x]

Afterthought

Whenever I listen to this sort of alternative hip hop I'm always transported to another world. One full of nostalgia, melancholy, happiness and a tranquil calm all in one. It's like trip hop but just more hypnotic because it has this constant rhythm that keeps you drawn in while the accommodating music around it takes you to the other places, all drawing you out in different directions simultaneously but without feeling too straining. I'm just in this really tripped out mood, glossing over my cerebral photobank about the past. Having so much time to yourself to think is really good at first, but as time goes on it kind of wears on you - having only your thoughts and fears about insecurities to occupy your mind can only change your perception of reality and relationships and as a result you tend to shy away, unsure of what to do for things and doubt the potential for the future.

Sigh, ah well good times, bad times eh?

The Groove

These past couple of months have been about re-exploring some of my "old" music and letting how good it is soak in. One of the bands I've been chilling and bopping my head to is Dungen (The Groove in english). It's this strange mix of arabian, jazz and indie with infectious groovy rhythms that you can't help but enjoy. You'll always see me on the train or bus bopping my head to it and just getting into the rhythm, which leads me to my next point. These past few months have been rather uneventful as is a gap year at home (the daily calender seems to fly out of the window), but it's also been a good time for reflection - becoming more easier with myself. Really, one of the biggest epiphany moments was actually a couple of days ago when I was on my way back from China Town and I was jamming to Soil And Pimp Sessions. The more I listened to it, the more it kind of hit me - just be comfortable in my own skin, enjoy my time and stop focusing on what's wrong and get on with things. See, my perspective on things is quite rather strange - it's like a kaleidoscope of negative thoughts brimming in my mind about how people are or how I am in respect to them. Sometimes It's just good to let myself fit into my personality suit and put it on and just walk out and enjoy it. I think alot of kudos goes to Soil and Pimp Sessions because listening to them reminded me of the last time I saw them and I just kind of didn't care about anything and enjoyed the gig fully - jumping around and singing the beats along with the song. I think it's the energy that attracts me to it and gets me positively minded about things.

Because I'm on a gap year doing practically nothing, I've run out of things to say so that's all i'm giving right now :P.

p.s. Michiko To Hatchin is a cool animé, especially the intro song =D

Testosterina

For some really odd reason I've been feeling the whole The Fast And Furious vibes; fast modded cars street racing crazily through public places. I was watching Tokyo Drift and I loved the drift races through cosmopolitan places! It's great, even though highly dangerous :P, but i guess that's what so testerone filled about it. As a result, the latest film in the series had to be watched, and for the most part it was pants. However, there's this race in the middle of the film which was awesome! they definitely need more races rather than chases :P.

So aside from the weird modded cars fascination what else has been happening? well first thing is I GOT INTO MEDICINE =D. Well surprised and chuffed about it man! Let the good times roll =D! Recently I've been just chilling and relaxing it out properly, but i've noticed I'm actually getting tense being at home everyday. Being in a room is starting to get to me a bit - We went to adnaan's house after shb's and tk's b-day shindig at the park and as soon as i walked into adnaan's room i really wanted to leave and just camp outside for the night. In a way I think it's a good thing to have that sense of wanting to go out all the time - It'll start tampering with my procastination modes that I have all the time. I even feel a little bit less lazier =D!

One thing I must do is start excercising - im in such bad shape it's starting to show. So note to self: RUN!

The Friendly Galaxies

I once owned a dough making machine.

it decided to jump out the window and lay some battery eggs

those eggs than transformed into a supercomputer that could hack CIA

this was a big thing in the egg kingdom that was always trying to promote peas

see no peas could be 2 in a pod coz them eggs were bare apartheid and were PROPER racist get me

there are two races of peas. the cooked race and the uncooked race. that were both from planet earth.

the earth that was in the 5th nebula of andromeda and therefore it was our earth's equivalent: kalapapaya

...this dramaticaly effected the ozone layer. the wizards that control the sky turned evil and decided to snow.

this weren't no oridinary snow this was pineapple snow where the muffin man could come and lick the street clean like a bum's heaven: he sure was a clean freak

life was all turning into a big lipstick tomato. it tried to spread its love by doing spellings but failed,

however the elf lords of kokori forest wanted to munch sams chicken so they ordered mr tahir sheikh on a dangerous mission to steal sams from the lipstick tomato rooster that loved playing scrabble after church.

the scabble was just a game to play to put him off hardcore insane interacial sex. this outlet was expressed in picking the words through scrabble...xrated scrabble.

but he couldn't resist the interracial sex between the roosters and the leprechauns....the green fur was just WAYY too sexy for him to keep playing scrabble and so freud argued that he had latent oral tendencies since he liked to lick the soul of the inner toe nail

what the leprechauns didnt realise that they could use banana skins to try and imitate the life in the cosmic worlds of stardust love. they all decided to live under 11 rainbows of silverspoons.

the silverspoons that would give them victory over the morally correct george clooney who owned a poodle, a RJ11 and an xbox 360 which gave him all the cosmic radiation to fight the new supertoilet that was coming to invade the asteroid moon orbiting uranus

i shot the sheriff. with a big shotgun made out of tunisian hair.

but FFS i didn't shoot the deputy, not that i should care

.........and that was the end of soloman grandee..........

enter sandman: HEALL YEAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH send whips of opinion down my back give me moreeee.

kyus: GoooaaaWWDD DAAAAOOYYMMNN SOOOOWAN OVVVOAAAA BIIIAAAYYYYCCCCCCCCHHAA!

TIMES CHANGE LIKE THE FALLING AUTUMN COCONUTS IN JAMAICA BUT IN REALITY JAMAICANS DON'T HAVE AUTUMN COZ THEY GOT BARE PIGEONS IN LEOTARDS RUNNING FOR MAYOR OF THE MISTY MOUNTAIN HOPS WHERE THE EVIL GOLLUM JUST RAMBLED ONNNN

...it was so cold and lonely the rain was tearing me up....

wind.. really hurts my feelings. so i decided to write about it in my amazing blog

the long and agonising descent of the snow sent painful lashings of my past memories of hiding in a banana skin....the macarbre peel....the toxicating stench of sugar and the mars bar that the scottish guy used to make banana mars bar.....OOOHH THE HORROR - if you want a no win no fee claim call 0800 657 1256.

have you had an accident?

The Mask

I just love this song. here's the lyrics:

[CHORUS] 
Have you ever worn the mask one-two one-two, 
M to the A to the S to the K 
Put the mask upon the face just to make the next day, 
Feds be hawkin me 
Jokers be stalking me, 
I walk the streets and camouflage my identity, 
My posse in the Brooklyn wear the mask. 
My crew in the Jersey wear the mask. 
Stick up kids doing boogie woogie wear the mask. 
Yeah everybody wear da mask but how long will it last. 

[CLEF] 
I used to work at Burger King. A king taking orders. 
Punching my clock. Now I'm wanted by the manager. 
Soupin me up sayin "Your a nice worker," 
"How would you like a quarter raise, move up the register" 
"Large in charge, but cha gotta be my spy, 
Come back and tell me who's baggin my fries, 
Getting high on company time." 
Hell no sirree, wrong M.C. 
Why should I be a spy, when you spying me, 
And you see whatcha thought ya saw but never seen. 
Ya missed ya last move, Checkmate! Crown me King, 
Hold my 22 pistol whipped him in his face. 
Hired now I'm fired, sold bud now I'm wired, 
Eyes pitch red but da beat bop my head 
Hit the streets for relief, I bumped into the Feds, 
I got kidnapped they took me to D.C., 
Have me working underground building missiles for World War III. 

[CHORUS] 
M to the A to the S to the K, 
Put the mask up on the face just to make the next day. 
Brothers be gaming, Ladies be claiming. 
I walk the streets and camouflage my identity. 
My posse Uptown wear the mask. 
My crew in the Queens wear the mask. 
Stick up kids with the Tommy Hil wear the mask. 
Yeah everbody wear the mask but how long will it last. 

[LAURYN] 

I thought he was the wonder, and I was stunned by his lips, 
Taking sips sipping Amaretto sour with a twist, 
Shook my hips to the bass line, this joker grabbed my waistline, 
Putting pressure on my spine trying to get L-Boog to wind, 
I backed up off him then caught him with five finger to his face, 
I had to put him in his place, 
This kids invading my space, 
But then I recognized the smile, but I couldn't place the style, 
So many fronts in his mouth, I thought he was the Golden Child, 
Then it hit me that's Tariq from off the street around Grams. 
I haven't seeen him since fifteen, when he got booked for doing scams. 
I tried to walk away but he wouldn't let me leave, 
He ran up quick behind me asking, "Yo what happened to my nigga 
Steve?" 
Steve was like this kid I went with back in Grammar School. 
I chuckled knucklehead I seen him yesterday he's cool, 
He's busted, "so who you checking for now?" 
Probably some intellectual. 
I kept the conversation straight and he kept trying to make it sexual. 
Then his old lady tried to play me waved her hands up in my face, 
Yo I told her check your man cause Bitch you acting out of place. 

[CHORUS] 
M to the A to the S to the K, 
Put the mask up on the face just to make the next day. 
Brothers be frontin, Then they be runnin, 
I walk the streets and camouflage my identity. 
My posse in the Bronx wear the mask
My crew on the hour wear the mask.
Stick up kids rollin' in the Omni wear the mask
Yeah everbody wear the mask but how long will it last. 

[PRAZ] 
3 A.M. in the morning on the Boulevard, 
I'm still at large engaged with my entourage, 
Me and Godfather and a 67 Dodge. 
I stepped out the note to post up my guard 
Searching for my car that was stolen from Scotland Yard. 
My first instinct was to check the chop shop garage. 
As I rung the bell someone tapped me on my back, 
I turned around to look it was a rookie in a mask. 
He said, "I got a itchin' on my trigger, 
Don't move nigga I'm taking you for murder." 
See cops got two faces like two laces on my Reeboks. 
My knees knock as I step back for a claear shot, 
Well did you shoot him? Naw kid I didn't have the balls, 
That's when I realized I'm pumpin'too much Biggie Smalls. 

[CHORUS] 
M to the A to the S to the K, 
Put the mask up on the face just to make the next day. 
Brothers be beafin, Cops be theivin
Brothers be sceamin', And should be teamin'
Jokers be smokin it, And stay broke in it,
B*tches be teasin, Get money sleazin',
N*gga's be creapin', Baby mothers be weapin',
I walk the streets and camouflage my identity. 
My posse in the Haiti wear the mask,
My crew in Jamaica wear the mask 
Stick up kids bumpin Fu-Gee-La wear the mask 
Yeah everbody wear the mask but how long will it 

Guardian Angel

So like im on a wireless keyboard - its revelationssssssssssssssssssssssss!

You know, Juno Reactor is pretty good! after hearing the xavier edit for texholnyse i can't watch that anime without watching the intro song - the whole industrial feel of the anime is all pinpointed by that song - the whole intro feels like it was made for that song. The anime is class - I love the artwork and animation where there's this whole gritty feel to it and there isn't much dialogue in it but you just feel like there's this sense of depression seeping out of the buildings that have been drawn - a sense of oppression and caste divides. I've only seen a few episodes but I do like it - I really want to sink my teeth into it but it's a little hard to follow without much dialogue :P. 

so er yeah wow i saw a pussycat dancing in the twilight looking for answers to a healthy alternative to chicken and chips.

This week has been a real nostalgia trip - a good one at. On tuesday i met up with CZ after around a year and man it felt good in a a platonic way. All those awkward moments and feelings seem to dissipate when we just got down to sitting down and catching up. When I went I thought to myself "maybe these feelings are going to bubble up to the surface - maybe all those memories are going to come back" but once we there they didn't =). However halifax made mention of it and they started coming back so im trying to figure out a way to (as the physicists say) "earth the current". Gotsta see when ze time comes and we be hustlin and hustlinnnnnz

safe i dunno what else to write coz im bare hypers and on a roll on my halo of desireeeeeee but i think i might see cloud 9 on a 6 that looks like a 5.

Park Bench People

There are those times when you just feel like you need to sit on a park bench and think things through - somewhere neutral without anything to immediately affect anything you want to do. Right now is one of those moments - you see right now i feel like that about alot of things. Talking to my bro was kind of enlightening about how i should really start to think about the future more seriously - how do i want my kids to turn out? what i value most is a set of moral principles and a self-confidence that won't hinder them like it's hindered me. Where do i want to be after 5 years? in all honesty - working and starting to actually have a career in focus and the wheel works actually moving. 

Another thing that i'm thinking of is something that's just been bugging me recently...right now i don't feel like talking the same way anymore....in a weird way though it's made me see things that i didn't put much effort into before - weird eh? i hope it fixes and i hope to do something about it. 

On a more lighter note I had the best jam i've ever had with anyone - me and shuaib and then me and adz with the changing members playing drums and me on the guitar. I actually got so into it i was getting into a trance feel - everything felt like it was connecting. I even got to the stage where i felt like i was in the woods and just feeling like i was at peace - the closest sensation to the feeling was like the salvia trip only not so forceful - it felt like a pure natural high. I need to do that again because man those types of feelings are the ones you want to hold onto....it's weird after not playing guitar for a while i went and had an amazing jam - almost as if i'd be penting up alot of stuff in order to get what i wanted out across finally. Hell i was so tranced out i didn't even realise adz sister walk in! and neither did adz - we got so into it....im glad we finally had a moment like that you know. sometimes we find it hard to talk to each other - one or the other will keep it kosher but this felt like a moment where we dropped all the boundaries and just talked like we hadn't talked in a long time. I even felt lighter talking to adz afterwards and the same goes for shuaib....im glad we all jammed together it was a nice feeling =).

Peace =)

Weather The Storm

So I recently downloaded FL studio 8 and have been playing with it ALOT. It's so much fun to make random beats with it mixing in all these random instruments. I can tell if you know how to use it properly you can do some serious musical scents with it :P. So far I've managed to do about a 2-3 second clip but I don't know how to add onto that, but I'm thinking of just getting a tutorial or guide in order to learn it - I'm feeling making some beats and adding on some guitar on top perhaps - i also really want to learn how to do those grand piano sounds I saw on youtube - they look proper hardcore - especially with the sweeping bit - it sounds like a real piano and not synthesised! But I definitely need to learn my music theory now because I don't understand what chord means what or how to move chords an octave higher or lower (im guessing you move a chord 8 notes up if you're using the piano as a base instrument but that's only a guess).

I was on YouTube and I managed to find KQ on youtube - the actual dude! so i commented on one of his vids and he replied back - i feel honoured! I love that guy's stuff, especially his remixes - they always have this weird spacey vibe to them and he does it all on FL! His side projects are slick as well, but really really trippy and cerebral - you can't listen to it expecting a beat, it's just mood music that has this really effect on your mind to just zone out completely. I think his stuff and Fat Jon's serve as sort of inspirations to really get into the whole FL studio flex and start learning it big style for some proper beat tings - you GETS ME!???????

oh big up my mandem Halifax - bare safe tings.

These last few days have been interesting - I went from being so content on sunday (so much so i'd not felt like that in god knows how long) to being pissed off in the same night, sigh it happens. Sometimes I think god is trying to show me something when it comes to these things but I need some time to sit and think about what. It seems to coincedental to be just random.

Anyhoo

I cannot think of anything else to write that will fill the space up for this blog so im just writing whatever I can think of that will make sense.

OOOOO i forgot to mention - Skins is an awesome series - the first 2 series are amazing - the actors are brilliant and it really highlights what teenagers are going through - isolation, love, having fun, finding yourself - although it's a big exaggerated of course and there's alot of sex but it's definitely worth watching. The directing is actually astounding - like there's this one scene where this girl drops the milk carton she's holding and you see it spilling down the stairs and she's trying to call someone but they won't respond because they're crying - just gives you that idea of that proverb about crying over spilt milk but it was done so well.

A Few Memories

Normally whenever i write a blog entry i have a song title that fits the mood or theme of what i'm writing. In this instance i've decided to just choose the song title that's been on my playlist recently - a song from the 2nd RahXephon OST. This song caught me off surprise because normally animé songs aren't actually that trippy and the reverbed out acoustic guitar compliments the pianos quite gracefully. It actually does give you the feeling that you're going deeper and deeper into a few memories of the past - the gentle piano sound giving delicate touch into memories whilst the guitar giving that touching sense of nostaligia. It's a good track in all honesty but memories is oddly and ironically enough something i've not been thinking too much about. Actually the biggest thing that's been preying upon me is idleness. The more this year passes by, the more i think about the disgust of idleness. Im starting to really see how much of a lazy guy i am! it's kind of scary in that i know what i have to do and start to feel it but don't have the will to actually do it. But I think T-mans right - you think too much when you're idle and I think im thinking too much not just about why i don't have the motivation but also about things in general. What I need is 2 things: first is a job, and second is a routine (which the job will provide, but for other more health related aspects - such as jogging and etc). 

One thing that has been keeping me away from pure bumness is trying to hook the old xbox to this pc. I took it from my bro and basically spent a long time trying to set up a network where the internet could still work yet i could connect my xbox to the pc and transfer files. I have to admit, Vista is a completely crap OS for doing this stuff in since I had trouble looking for ways to making a wired LAN connection. inevitably though I had to use a FTP program to create a session for the xbox but before that had to set up an IP for the xbox that was different to the PC so that they didn't clash (the pc has a dynamic IP and i didn't know how to set a static IP for the xbox so that they didn't clash and disconnect from the internet). However, somehow i managed it so i've got some animés off the pc and onto the xbox for some rather peaceful viewing =D. One thing I noticed though was how the quality of RMVBs improve when you use a CRT tv screen in comparison to the LCD pc screen i was using. Like when i was watching RahXephon on the pc i could see the rather pixelated form that RMVBs usually have, but on the tv screen it was alot less noticeable for one and the colours were actually much better. In fact although there was a difference compared to AVIs, it didn't grant the size difference between the two file formats. All in all though, i've got some animé series to watch + some films.

The most recent series I have seen - after a long animé hiatus - was RahXephon. Man, at first I wasn't that impressed, it was quite slow after the first episode until around episode 10. The first episode had alot going on so you were immediately sucked into this struggle between the two races. After that it was like every episode had a Dolem that had to be fought and so felt rather repititive. However, once episode 10 rolled in the whole structure of each episode seem to change and you got to see the build up of certain relationships (i have to say the love triangles and god knows what other shapes you could use to describe the relationships was next and was decently handled). Then the more artistic side of the story started to pop out. I think one of the highlights was the romance. Normally im not a fan of romance, but i think in this series it was so well handled i was surprised. The shots used to describe it and the facial animations really painted this slow but steadily increasing intense relationship between two of the main protagonists. The actual story though was kind of interesting although one watch through isn't enough to actually give you the whole story and i was still confused about certain aspects until i went online and actually saw the timeline written out for it. once i read that it made a whole lot more sense and made me appreciate it more. If i was going to give it a verdict, it'd have to be:

4/5 - it loses a point for the rather boring first few episodes.

Definitely watch it if you don't mind a bit of a headscrew that doesn't try and be too pretentious about it (although i hate using that word) and good romance.

Peace!

New Sentimentality

I finally managed to pick up two things that I had purchased more than a year ago: Kokoro and Seven Samurai. Maybe this month im feeling the need to actually pick these things up, especially since I left them a long time out of sheer laziness. It's kind of funny how I picked up both of these things almost recently. I remember finishing The Alchemist and thinking I really needed a book that was more contemporary and even post modern in some of it's outlook - Murakami got me on that whole wavelength with Kafka. The surrealism in that book is perhaps it's biggest
 draw - you just get sucked into this world of bizarre occurances and essentially complexities of the human soul: trying to survive but trying to understand and comprehend complex feelings and difficult situations. Murakami isn't overly optimistic yet neither is he overly pessimestic; he just sits in the middle :P.

Kokoro is an interesting read though because you can see a number of things. The first is its impact on Murakami's own writing - Soseki's writing shares themes such as the nature of friendships and relationships as does Murakami but I think Kokoro isn't so gritty about it. That's not a bad thing at all, on the contrary you get both sides of the friendship told. You have the student who remains nameless throughout explaining why he's so intrigued by Sensei (the other main character) and how different he is to what he's been raised up with. Sensei on the other hand plays a very introverted character who retains a sense of mystery about his past and his views on love and life and as a result has fascinated the student. It doesn't read like a "classic" novel; it feels so contemporary that when I imagine the events I see them in present day rather than turn of the 20th century which is roughly when Kokoro was written. 

Secondly, what kind of ideas does the book try and address? like i mentioned the nature of friendship and the perceptions of participants in those friendships. The student is really interested to learn from Sensei and feels that he won't be disappointed by who Sensei really is and as a result wants to find out the truth, whereas Sensei on the otherhand has trouble trusting many people after a fateful event in his life which caused a gradual change in his personality and his outlook on life to become more cynical. He is an isolated man because of lack of trust and the student looks to seek out the answers. Their friendship seems fragile but grows as the novel progresses but you always get the sense that while the two begin establishing a connection, there is a wall between the two which Sensei erects until the climax, fundamentally depicting the isolation we feel in everyday life to other people and how we seek to find a connection that is sustainable and deep enough to mean something to our core. It's rather ironic that Sensei finally let's his wall down completely but finds his own demise in it. The person the student finds the most inspirational is Sensei - who is a character that doesn't hold a "rank" in society, but has his own ideals of life and of love which makes the student more and more intrigued with him and I think that Soseki's portrayal is really a modern outlook on how are parents may assume we should see things in one way because they want it for our benefit but in reality we don't accept it because they do not offer anything that really addresses the heart or "Kokoro" as the book's title is labelled.

Soseki also tries to look at the gap between two generations and how what we want maybe different to what our elders want or think of what we've achieved. It's kind of interesting because the student has a balance of filialness yet disagrees with his parents even though he may not openly admit it out of respect. But it really highlighted how different times have changed during the last century and how that has affected generation gaps that have usually kept rather similar ideologies. 

Soseki also looks at women's place in society and how although at the time they may have "certain roles" he tries to explain that we should look beyond that. I think if we translated that into a more modern context it could be tolerance of not just women but of race too so it's interesting to see a classical novelist trying to look at an idea such as this.

All in all though, it's really worth reading and I was surprised at it. I remember trying to read it a year ago and thinking "what the?!" because I was so used to a fantasy like novel, but if you are open about novel form than it's worth picking up definitely.

Seven Samurai was awesome as well. At first watching it I was kind of like "meh" but the second half really picked things up. It's an interesting look on caste differences between farmers and samurai and how people were "born" into these families. Kikichikoyo was my favourite character by far - his brazen and rough nature was funny but he had a real history as to why he was like that, why he tried to become a samurai and his understanding of the situation better than any of the other samurai because he was a farmer. He makes this really passionate plea about how farmers are miserly and lie but do so because of samurai. It really hit home the sense of oppression that caste systems had and still have on people. One thing Kurosawa is really into is the idea of cycles. Throughout the film he has these shots of the watermill just spinning but it depicts this idea of calmness initially, but you see some of the darker aspects of the idea of cycles. Especially when they farmers are defending the village from bandits and Kikichikoyo grabs this child that is crying with that watermill behind just carrying on spinning whilst the accompanying house is burning down and he is screaming out and crying about how the child was him when he was younger - It contrasted the earlier scene that had the peaceful spin of the watermill by a mile. The ending was really class though: that final shot really highlighted the futility of war; how nothing had changed for the samurais looking to seek a way out of their role and how different the farmers were to the samurais.

A very good film, but you need patience to watch it: clocks in at 207 minutes spread over 2 discs.

On that note, here's that closing scene shot. Peace out!

(Note: this is not the full pic - here's a link to the full thing: http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e189/drunkenmaster42/SevenSamurai6.jpg)